Businesses Worry Vermonters Won’t Be Able to Put Aside Gratitude on Black Friday

WILLISTON – As many Vermonters sat down to family dinners on Thursday and celebrated their abundance, some business owners were concerned that some of those feelings of contentedness will spill over into Friday.

“It’s a huge concern,” says one Best Buy employee, who wishes to remain anonymous. “I mean, Thanksgiving is one day, and then it should be right back to unhappiness and capitalism, but do people get that? It’s a worry for sure. The last thing we need is for people to continue to be grateful for what they have on the biggest shopping day of the year.”

Some merchants are likening Black Friday gratitude to people who play Christmas music before Thanksgiving, saying that it is seasonally inappropriate.

“You wanna show up at my house to trick or treat on November 1st? Well too bad, you missed it!” blurted out the manager of Old Navy. “Free candy is for October 31st, and being at peace with yourself and your possessions is for Thanksgiving only. It’s time to wake up, look at that turkey carcass rotting on the counter because you forgot to put it away last night, and realize that the only thing that can fix the hole in your soul is a brushed-knit turtleneck sweater.”

The Winooski encourages all Vermonters to skip the Black Friday sales this year, and instead send your money directly to our offices. We would be very grateful.

Image Credits: NNECAPA.

Liked it? Take a second to support The Winooski on Patreon!

Be the first to comment

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.


*