SOUTH BURLINGTON – The National Weather Service branch located at the Burlington Intranational Airport has released data for the month of November showing a record number of complaints about snow. Vermonters set records both for most complaints during the month of November, and also most complaints before Thanksgiving. The previous record for complaining about the snow was set in 1996, at least since records were kept on this issue starting back in 1867.
“We were surprised,” said NWS employee Gail Forza, “especially with Thanksgiving so early this year. When the last record was set, in 1996, Thanksgiving was on the 28th, as late as it could be, plus we got all that snow. But this year, on the 22nd, the earliest possible date for the holiday, to have a record number of complaints before Thanksgiving, I mean, you just don’t expect to see that sort of thing.”
The report from the NWS points to two probable contributing factors to the large number of complaints this year. The first is that there has been an usually large amount of snow early in the season. The second factor is that everyone is just much grumpier these days than they used to be, with happiness levels lower across the board, leading to increased complaining.
“I used to love the snow,” said Vermont resident Flora Dow, “but then I used to love a lot of things. It’s been a rough couple of years. Thinkin’ ’bout retiring to Tampa actually. Hear they get less snow.”