Mount Ascutney Renamed to Mount Mounty McMountface

WINDSOR – After lengthy debate, local opposition, and several community meetings, the Vermont Library Board has changed the name of Mount Ascutney to Mount Mounty McMountface. The board of libraries is the organization responsible for the names of geographic features in the state, such as mountains, hills, lakes, and ponds.

The controversy over the name arose when it was discovered that “Ascutney” is a bit of nonsense that means nothing, prompting a call to change the name back to the original Abenaki name of “Kaskadenak.” Windsor residents were adamant that the new name for the mountain not contain 3 “K”s, so as to distance themselves from any hate groups, and began circulating a petition to deny the name change.

After hearing of the discomfort with the native name for the mountain, the board asked locals for other suggestions on potential mountain names that were not “nonsensical drivel,” prompting Vermont’s large troll population to flood the organization with the most absurd names imaginable. A special meeting was held to discuss the name change, and it was finally decided that if people wanted a foolish, made-up name with no real meaning, they would choose the name that best fit that description. Mounty McMountface beat Asctuney by only one vote.

Image Credits: VTDigger.

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