Alburgh to Offer “Paint & Guzzle” Classes

ALBURGH – Hoping to increase attendance and diversify their base, the Alburgh Country Club has cancelled their Tuesday night “Paint & Sip” classes, replacing them with “Paint & Guzzle” classes instead.

The new class will be very similar to the old one, and the ACC wants worried patrons to know that the only difference will be the amount of alcohol consumed. “We had some questions and concerns about how much a ‘sip’ was,” says instructor Amanda Tonnelet, “and we don’t want anyone feeling self-conscious. I also worry that with the old name some people might have thought it was somehow about art. Now I think it’s perfectly clear that we’re here to drink as much as possible.”

Alburgh residents are applauding the change, calling the new class “way more enjoyable,” and “definitely a thing I would go to now.” The first class garnered rave reviews from participants, whose artwork was noticeably improved from the previous sessions. A very excited mother of three stumbled out of the ACC on Tuesday evening holding a painting of a bowl of fruit and said “YEAAAHHHHH! THAT WAS THE [expletive deleted]! I LOVE DRUNKING!” [sic]

Paint and Guzzle will happen Tuesdays at 7:30 PM at the Alburgh Country Club.

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